Before Amen {At Advent}
An Advent study on prayer adapted from the book Before Amen by Max Lucado
Father,
You are good.
I need your help. Heal me and forgive me.
They need help.
Thank you.
In Jesus’ name, amen.
Day 2: I need your help
“Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly. But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream.” – Matthew 1:18-20a
Joseph Prays:
I can only imagine the range of emotions running through Joseph as his betrothed tried to explain how she got pregnant; anger, fear, dismay, disbelief, just to name a few.
Did she wonder anxiously, trying to think of when would be an ok time to tell Joseph privately?
Or, did she run to him excitedly, thinking there would be no way he would be able to reject and shame her because she had been visited by an angel?
And what words does a young woman use to possibly convey what she saw and heard?
Their world was turned upside down by this news.
Matthew tells us that Joseph was a just man, that he quietly came to his decision, and that he considered all the things that Mary had said to him. Joseph was a man of character, and he had a tough decision to make. He knew what he could do.
He could publically shame Mary, and she would be stoned to death. He did not want that for her. Instead, he resolved to divorce her.
We aren’t told how much time elapsed between the events in this story, but being that Joseph was a man of integrity we can guess that Mary’s condition was on his heart daily, and that he spent time in prayer to help him make the best decision.
Joseph needed God’s help and wisdom to remain true to his character and to not shame Mary. What a difficult place to be in!
In today’s world, when we come up against minor problems, we often turn them into major problems, and jokingly, sometimes we call them “first world problems”.
Lucado says, “We can only wonder: How many disasters would be averted if we’d go first, in faith, to [prayer]?”
In Philippians 4:-7 (TLB), Paul says:
“Don’t worry about anything, instead, pray about everything; tell God your needs and don’t forget to thank him for his answers. If you do this, you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus.”
Joseph and Mary were dealing with a human nature problem where religious, social, and marriage customs in a small little community guided acceptable behavior. Any deviation from the norm moved from a private affair to a public one, and in no time, EVERYONE knew each other’s business.
Joseph, no doubt, spent time privately weighing his options, praying, and trying to decide the best possible way for everyone to come out of this situation unscathed.
Joseph knew the goodness of God, and he needed God’s help to make a tough decision. He took the opportunity to prayerfully consider his options before making his decision, relying on what he knew, what he felt in his heart, and what he believed.
When we are faced with tough decisions, we can use the word of God to guide our answer, we can pray for help, and we can seek the counsel of wise friends. Through the discipline of prayer, Joseph turned to his faith to find wise answers.
Nahum 1:7 says, “The LORD is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble; He knows those who take refuge in Him.” Joseph knew God and he took refuge in Him as he made up his mind.
Mary Prays:
In the book of Luke we read about Mary’s perspective of when she learned she would carry the Son of God.
“In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent from God to a city of Galilee name Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. And the virgin’s name was Mary. And he came to her and said, ‘Greetings, O favored one, the Lord is with you!’ But she was greatly troubled at the saying, and tried to discern what sort of greeting this might be.” – Luke 1:25-29
I can imagine Mary thinking, “Favored one? I’m just a girl, one child in my family, I live in a poor community of hard workers and laborers. If you’re looking for a favored one, shouldn’t you go over to the city?” and, “Why would the Lord be with ME? I’m a woman, not a man, not a priest. I am nobody that the Lord would be with me. I say my prayers, and I keep kosher, I follow the law, and I give just like everyone else, why would that make me special?” I can almost see the wheels turning in her head at the sight and message of Gabriel.
Luke goes on to give more examples of Mary’s quiet, contemplative demeanor. The first one takes place right after the birth of Jesus, when the shepherds come to see him and Luke says, “But Mary treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart,” (Luke.2:19). Another is when Jesus was twelve years old and was found by his frantic parents in the temple teaching to an astonished crowd. Luke says, “And his mother treasured up all these things in her heart.” (Luke 2:51b)
It would seem that Mary was a thinker, one who observantly gathered information, pondering, and treasuring other’s thoughts.
Instead of firing off a million questions, she listened to what Gabriel had to say, the message he brought her from God. He comforted her fears and answered her questions. Discerning with God’s help led Mary to grace, and obedience.
…31’And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus.’ 34And Mary said to the angel, ‘How will this be, since I am a virgin?’ And the angel answered her, ‘The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be called holy – the Son of God. And behold, your relative Elizabeth in her old age has also conceived a son, and this is the sixth month with her who was called barren. For nothing will be impossible with God.’
And Mary said, ‘Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.’ And the angel departed from her.” – Luke 1:26-38
What obedience in faith! Mary gives us an example of praying when we need help and taking steps to faithfully obey, even when what we are being led to do seems counter-intuitive to what we think.
Mary boldly accepted her message from the angel Gabriel and willingly told Joseph the news.
And as he “slept on it,” he received a message that went against the decision he had made to quietly divorce Mary.
As much time as he spent considering his options, God had a great plan for him, even greater than Joseph could have imagined. He had wanted to save Mary’s life, but in his obedience to God, he has saved lives for generations around the world.
“But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, ‘Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.’” (Matthew 1:20-21)
Mary and Joseph had tough decisions to make and problems that needed discernment and wisdom to obey. Rather than dealing with them emotionally, physically, or immaturely, they prayed. Joseph prayed to make a tough decision and Mary wisely listened and obeyed.
“The LORD confides in those who fear him, he makes his covenant known to them.” Psalm 25:14
Max Lucado says this about problems, “the punch line is clear: take your problem to [prayer]. Don’t take your problems to the bar. Jim Beam cannot solve them. Don’t take your problems out on others. Temper tantrums never advance the cause. The moment you sense a problem, however large or small, take it to [prayer].”
We might answer: “Max, if I take my problems to Jesus every time I have one, I’m going to be talking to Jesus all day long.” (Now you are getting the point.)”
Lucado likens a problem to an “embedded thorn.” Leaving it alone causes irritation, infection, and sensitivity. Like a splinter in the finger, it spreads from the finger, to the hand, to the arm.
How many ways could Mary and Joseph’s story have gone wrong if they lived today? Paternity tests, no marriage even considered, or lengthy vicious court battles, and possibly abortion?
When we need help, prayer takes the burden off of our shoulders and puts it in God’s capable hands.
He has a plan for each one of us to be uniquely used to accomplish his eternal plan. We need a prayer life to make tough decisions, to wisely discern God’s will, and to willingly obey.
When we are facing tough times and need help we can turn Scripture into prayer.
Romans 8:28 could be prayed like this, “God, I know that because I love you, you work all things that I have to face together for good purpose, because you have called me according to Your purpose.”
God works unexpectedly sometimes, and we don’t always have a clear vision of where we are going, but we need to look at the light on the very next step and trust Him to be in front of us in the dark. God worked His good plan into Mary and Joseph’s lives, and through them, He brought His Son to save the world.
Lucado says, “God delights when we say, ‘I need help!’ Mature faith does not declare, ‘I can do it all by myself.’”
Discussion:
- Tell about an answered prayer that was specific, shocking, and faith-building.
- Where do we tend to take our problems rather than bringing them to Jesus, trusting Him, and then leaving them there?
Reflection:
- What are the situations in which my default button is to declare, “I can do it myself”? How can I begin calling out to God and saying, “I need your help”?
Action:
Honest Evaluation of where I need Help
- Make a list of four areas in your life where you tend to trust yourself more than you should instead of calling upon God for His help:
Area 1: In your Relational Life
Area 2: In your Spiritual Life
Area 3: In your Financial and Economical Life
Area 4: In your Occupational Life